Tuesday, September 25, 2007

A Confession, of sorts (notice the tongue in cheek)

Okay. I have a confession to make. It's a moment that I realized I have a deep dark part of me that surfaces daily. But I must tell the whole story so you get a sense of my depravity...please read with great understanding as I bear my soul.
Here we go. As many of you know, I ride a motorcycle as my primary means of transportation. I ride a 2001 Harley Davidson Electra Glide Standard with Thunder Headers and Thunder head pipes. It's not just loud, it's a deep throaty loud that every bike should sound like. There have been times when I've started "Harley" and the sound has caused women to scream from being startled and children began weeping, covering their ears, and running. It's so loud and deep that as I rode to the "office" one day, my wife was at the bank drive-thru (around behind the building) and she heard me ride by.
Anyway, I digress. My schedule is as such that it's usually mid to late dinner time before I head home in the evenings. And some nights it's later. And my usual traffic pattern is to ride by a restaurant that is in my neighborhood. It turns out there is an employee of that restaurant that has a white Ford Mustang with an alarm that is sensitive enough that my bike will set it off. It has become a daily event for me to see if I can set that alarm off with my bike. As I ride by it, I drop a gear and accelerate until I see the Mustang's headlights start flashing (since I can't hear the alarm because of the bike). It's a regular part of my day to set that alarm off. Well, last Friday, as I watched the lights flashing and imagined the horn honking, this evil laugh escaped my lips..."Mwuaah hahahaa!" Then it occured to me: what if the kid who owns that Mustang thinks there is something wrong with his alarm and keeps taking it in to get it worked on? What if he thinks that someone in our neighborhood keeps trying to break into his car at work? What if he thinks his alarm doesn't work and quits setting it? All because I enjoy setting it off...Does it make me evil if I enjoy, nay seek out, setting this alarm off daily? What do you think?
Well, there it is. My dark secret is out. If any of you know where I could find help for this devious addiction, please let me know.

3 comments:

Len said...

Too funny . . er. . .I mean. . . bad pastor, bad pastor!

Amos said...

your slide into depravity will only lead to more sinister results...you will know that you have fallen deeper when you purposely drive thru apartment parking lots late at night and count the number of alarms you set off...repent now o sinner...

Emily said...

I can hear your evil laugh right now......yikes!