Friday, November 07, 2008

A "New" Word

I'm reading "The Tangible Kingdom," by Hugh Halter and Matt Smay, and in my reading this morning, I stumbled upon a word that is not new, per se, but is just the word that I needed to read today.  It's a word that comes closest to expressing how I feel.  I've had this feeling for some time, and couldn't quite put my finger on it until just a few moments ago.  The moment was so impacting that I put the book down and came straight here to get this thought "on paper."  

The word is "tension."  Here of late I have had this feeling of unrest, imbalance, or an uneasy feeling that may even be pouring out through physical expression.  My pilgrimage over the last 3 years has brought me to a place of question and unrest.  I had hoped it would do just the opposite.  Yet I find myself more so there than when I began the current leg of my pilgrimage.  In spite of a new focus, new methodology, new resources and friends, I still have not seen people coming to Christ the way I had hoped.  And that has fostered this tension that I know understand.  Perhaps you feel it.  Perhaps you long for something different.  Maybe, like me, you have this gut-level tension that longs to see other Sojourners find faith and a community that brings them life.  

So, what do you do with tension?  I could get a spiritual massage, I guess, and placate the longing by thinking about the good we've done in the last three years.  But I think I am going to do the opposite.  Often times, after a good work out, my muscles experience a tension from the exertion.  And I have found, at least for me, that working the tension out in another workout helps.  Now, to figure out what that looks like spiritually...  Any thoughts?

1 comment:

neecie said...

when I first read this entry it really made me think and I just had to put it away for awhile before I could comment on it. I know what you are talking about the frustration of others not coming to Christ. I think what causes more tension for me is those who claim they are followers of Christ yet don't embrace and do the things they should do to grow in that relationship. But then I think, "that used to be me". I have been in that place of placing Christ in the backseat of my life. I don't really know the answer except to keep on keeping on and just trying to bring the ones that are lost to Christ and to help encourage those that are believers to be more aggressive in their following of him. JB you do a good job @ what you do. You encourage me just by yours and mrs. JB examples of how you live. You are good encouragers so don't get frustrated. You do more than you know.