Tuesday, September 06, 2005

A Man's Gotta Do What A Man's Gotta Do.

Wow. It seems like a while since I last just sat and wrote something. I've been super busy. Probably too busy. It has been a hectic couple of days with all kinds of things happening. Here's the short list of things that have happened in the last 7 days: preached 3 messages at The Heights, played bass for the band at The Heights 4 times (1 rehearsal, 3 leading worship), been to the camp at Floydada three times (12 hours of mowing just today!), 14 hours of Red Cross volunteer work (all yesterday), killed 2 diamond-backed rattle snakes, learned to drive a big John Deer tractor, rode to Tulia on my Honda, Caryn's mom (Peggy) was here for Labor Day weekend, filed my 501c3 forms, finished what should be the final proposal for The Journey, went bowling with my kids, ate lots of Taco Bueno, and mowed lawns with my buddy Pedro. I've been very busy. It all really hit me tonight, though, as I helped with dishes at the camp. My passion, my calling, is to pastor The Journey. Yet, because of the status of things and it being a church start from scratch, my time is spent pursuing other avenues of revenue so that my family can get by. As I was putting away salad tongs, I thought, "I put myself through Seminary, 96 hours worth of grad work, so that I can mow lawns and wash dishes..." It was a pretty defeated moment for me. But, a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. And I gotta take care of my family. I know, God will take care of my family, and I'm sure that He is by providing me with many opportunities to make some extra moola. But I'm so "stopped up" with all my ideas and longings to be kicking it into high gear with The Journey that I feel like I'm wasting my time. Don't get me wrong. If I could chose to do anything, it'd be to hang with my family. And I'm getting some time to do that (more than when I was a Full-time Student Pastor!). But I'm just not finding the time to get in there and get the ball rolling. And I've got 5 other people who are part of The Journey that are all watching me, taking their cues from me, and I've done nothing for them. Now, the nice thing about spending so much time mowing, driving, and doing mindless stuff is that I get a chance to think. But too much thinking puts me into a stuper. And me in a stuper is no good for anyone. Be praying that I'll be able to get things moving. I'm still trying to find a sponsor church, and get our funding squared away. I have a couple of leads, but haven't had time to follow up on them. Can anyone add a couple of hours to the day so that I can find the time?
The highlight of my day was taking Jeremiah to school on my motorcycle this morning. He loves the bike (that's my boy!). He came into my bedroom this morning at about five o'clock. I had gotten in from Red Cross volunteer stuff at 1 this morning, so I'd had 4 hours sleep. He curled up next to me and just said he wanted to sleep there for a while. Usually he keeps me awake because he wiggles and hugs and snuggles, but he really went back to sleep there on my arm. It's fun to watch him and Cayla. They are both growing up so fast. It's hard to watch sometimes. God has truly blessed me with a wonderful family. My wife and kids are the best. And seeing them this morning before I left for Floydada was encouragment enough to get me through tomorrow when I'll see them again.
Well, enough typing. I gotta be up mowing again at 7 a.m. So, Peace out!

1 comment:

Parke said...

Keep on plugging away. You know it, but the struggle is worth it. Stephen can tell you, but the crazy long hours don't stop when Journey roles around.